rissy stories

Hey guys,

So, here we go again, just another person giving a review on 2016.

I normally never create posts about New Years for that specific reason: it’s been overdone, and a lot of it is considered cliche stuff. Well, this year has been eventful for literally everyone that I know (positively and negatively), including myself. So, I figured that I’d jump on the bandwagon for this one (plus, I’m a little too good at analyzing things).

A lot of great things happened this year to me personally, but a lot of things have happened this year all around the world that have been very disheartening. I’ve had my share of ups and downs like everyone else, and I’m definitely not the same person that I was at the beginning of this year. However, unlike most posts that I’ve seen so far about 2016, it definitely has NOT been the absolute worst for me (2012 was worse).

But it hasn’t been the best either.

At the very beginning of this year, two big events took place. First, one of my best friends/my biggest support system moved to a different country in March. He’s been gone for almost a year now, but when he first left, it was really rough for me. He’s always been a very positive influence in my life and it was devastating to know that there’s a 12 hour time difference between us. However, this experience has made me slightly more independent and it taught me that I can maintain a strong friendship, despite distance.

Secondly, one month before he left, I was also awarded my first cat: Sootie. If you follow me on this blog, Facebook, and Instagram, you know exactly who I’m talking about because I post pictures of him ALL. THE. TIME.

I picked Sootie out at the Humane Society in my college town, and he did an amazing job at filling the void that I felt when my best friend first left. He is a wonderful, adorable emotional support animal who has done wonders for my mental health this year in the physical absence of my best friend. Sootie makes me laugh, he forces me to take breaks, he’s always happy to see me when I walk through the door, and he makes me feel loved.

I believe that he has helped me with my anxiety, which positively affects my grades as well as my social life. I’ve met and befriended a lot of people who want to come and visit him in my dorm. I now have a better social life than I’ve ever had, so even though my best friend physically leaving was difficult, the experience was not nearly as bad as I originally thought it would be because my friend and Sootie both helped me to grow as a person.

However, stepping back a little bit, the beginning of this year included the spring semester of my junior year of undergrad. The semester, in and of itself, wasn’t the worst, but it wasn’t the best. It was made rough by these two life-changing events that took place from the get-go, but academically-speaking, it wasn’t nearly as tough as freshman and sophomore years.

Now, I never thought I’d be thankful for the rough four years between 2012 and 2016, but thankfully those tough years prepared me well for every problem that was thrown at me this year, which more than likely would have really set me back otherwise. For instance, I’ve been much more aware of myself this year than in years past, which has helped me to drastically reduce the amount of anxiety attacks that I have. Granted, they weren’t eliminated completely, but they weren’t nearly as extreme as they used to be.

Towards the end of that spring semester, I was granted with Level I CRLA (College Reading & Learning Association) Certification as a Writing Center Tutor:

This is a big accomplishment because I was one of the first ones to get certified at my college, and I’ve always been pretty proud of this. However, a few days after I was awarded with this, I traveled west for the first time. I went on the Utah trip that I spent all summer blogging about:

I was extremely nervous for this trip, and honestly, I initially did not want to go. My mother had taken Sootie back home with her and I wanted to go back with them. However, despite how difficult it was to live in close quarters with eight other people and out of a van for two weeks, this experience was mostly positive for me and it taught me a lot. My interest in Geology was sparked again after a year and a half of not studying it, it also sparked my interest in traveling, I made more friends, I took a lot of pictures, I collected a lot of rocks, and I LOVED the west coast.

This trip will always have a special place in my heart, and I’m SO glad I stepped out of my comfort zone to do some of the things that I did.

Oh, and I also made Deans List for that semester too 🙂

Now, moving onto the summer. The summer of 2016 wasn’t very glamorous or restful for me like the summer of 2015 was – I worked as a housekeeper at the Hampton Inn for the majority of the summer with coworkers who were never exactly thrilled to have to work with me. The job paid well, I worked hard, and it supplied me with the money that I needed for my senior year of undergrad, but constantly being surrounded by people who never wanted to be there, who appeared annoyed at everything I did, and who rarely ever helped me out or talked to me, was all-in-all a pretty rough experience.

This taught me patience, but it certainly tested my anger issues.

Then, after a long day at work, I came home to a family that has been going through very serious, ongoing issues for the past 3 years. And I won’t lie, it was difficult for me to live for three consecutive months in a small house with three other people and four cats – in a situation where family members outright hate each other, feel borderline suicidal, back-stab each other on the daily, and are slowly slipping into delirium. Not to mention all of the hate going on all across the world at the same time. We had a lot go down over the summer in regards to hate crimes, protests, terrorism, etc.

The summer was overall extremely disheartening on all levels, but thankfully I did end up getting more into politics than I ever have (which is important for me, as a writer, to know what’s going on in the world and to have an opinion). This also encouraged me to vote for the first time in the fall (the first time that I’ve been allowed to, anyways).

I also enjoyed time with my family on occasion and I spent quality time with my parents, but I felt numb for the majority of the summer, just bottling things up because no one likes it when I freak out.

So, I journaled and wrote A LOT to cope. 

Then the summer finally ended, but the toughest semester of my life (academically-speaking) began. The fall semester of my senior year was extremely rough from beginning to end. Thankfully my new, spacious, and air-conditioned dorm room was one of the best things that happened to my roommate and I at the beginning of this school year after spending the last three years living in horrifically small, shabby dorms. My roommate and I have our own living spaces now as well as a main living area:

(My living space)

(The main living area in between the two living spaces)

However, I was thrown in with all kinds of near insurmountable obstacles every single week of that semester (There are seriously too many to mention – that’s another blog entry if you really want to know). My anxiety was at an all time high, but thankfully various factors (Sootie, my progressing social life, working to get 6-8 hours of sleep per night, counseling, & meds) helped keep my meltdowns to a minimum so that I could be as close to a normal, functioning human being as possible.

Unfortunately, while I was trying to keep it together, everyone around me seemed to be falling into the pit of despair this semester, and I actually made a few more new friends by bonding over how doomed we all were. (And Trump getting elected for president in November certainly didn’t help.) My roommate had an even rougher semester than I did (and even the majority of the friends that I now have through this experience), and at the end of every day, we just kept saying to each other over and over:

“I just want to graduate. Why does it have to be so impossible? That’s all I want. I just want to graduate.”

And now that I think about it – a 300-level geology course, after spending a year and a half just focusing on English, probably wasn’t my smartest move this semester for me. Sedimentology and Stratigraphy was one of the hardest classes I’ve ever taken, and I probably should have tried something a little less extreme after not taking a geology course in one and a half years.

(From a field trip to Franklin, WV – the Rosehill Formation – one of my favorite ones)

However, Capstone, my big senior project, was probably the most stressful out of the majority of the work I had to do this semester. Due to this class alone, I couldn’t start graduate school searching or job hunting because I was just SO busy. I didn’t have time to figure out what I wanted to do with my future because I had so much to do just to graduate. Therefore, I STILL don’t know what’s going to happen after I graduate. (I’m working on it.)

Despite this, I miraculously made it through my Capstone presentation and I finished this semester with straight A’s (which has only happened one other time in my undergraduate lifetime). And as previously stated, my social life flourished more than it ever has. I go out for drinks with friends now, which I’ve never done before. I hang out in other people’s dorm rooms instead of simply staying in my own. We also have visitors in our room almost daily and Sootie loves it, especially when one of my friends brings his emotional support kitten to play with Sootie. Overall, I feel more at home than I ever have in my college town.

(Capstone Presentation)

It was a roller-coaster of a semester to say the least.

Now, I’m in the middle of winter break, and I’m trying to get work done, but this year has pretty much exhausted me – from my own personal life to what’s going on out there in the world. It’s been great and not-so-great, but a very eventful year for me overall (and for everyone else I know).

I’m glad to see it go though, as I know it’s been a rough year for everyone.

As far as resolutions go, I guess I only have a few generic ones:

1. Start becoming healthier in regards to my diet and exercise.
2. Try to figure out what I’m going to do with my life after graduation in May.
3. Continue making my mental health a priority.
4. Continue spoiling Sootie.
5. Read, read, read.
6. Improve my writing skills.

Happy New Year, let’s make 2017 better. ❤